6 Ways Parents Can Help Girls Grow Up With a Positive Body Image

WithAll’s Expert Advisory Panelist Charlotte Markey, Ph.D., shares six evidence-based strategies parents can use to help girls develop a positive body image and navigate today’s appearance-focused culture.

Parents today are raising girls in a cultural environment filled with unrealistic beauty ideals and constant social comparison. It’s no surprise that body dissatisfaction can begin very early, with some girls worrying about their appearance before kindergarten.

The encouraging news? Research consistently shows that parents and caregivers play a powerful role in shaping how girls think and feel about their bodies. What adults say, model, and prioritize can either reinforce harmful cultural messages or help girls develop a resilient and compassionate relationship with their bodies.

In nearly three decades of research on body image, I’ve seen how often parents say they are learning alongside the kids in their lives. A revised edition of The Body Image Book for Girls builds on this shared learning with updated research, new activities, and expanded discussions about social media, mental health, relationships, and self-care.

Below are six evidence-based ways parents can help girls grow up body positive.

1. Change the Way You Talk About Bodies

Many adults grew up hearing what researchers call “fat talk” — comments about weight, shape, or eating habits often framed as humor or casual conversation.

While common, research shows this kind of body-focused negativity is linked to lower body satisfaction and greater weight bias in both adults and children.

A more helpful shift is to focus on what bodies can do, not just how they look. When people focus on body functionality — strength, movement, resilience — they report higher body appreciation and less self-criticism.

What parents can do:

• Avoid negative comments about your own body or others’ bodies.
• Highlight what bodies can do: hugging, running, dancing, learning, healing.
• Respond to appearance concerns with empathy, then broaden the conversation beyond looks.

2. Teach Girls to Question Beauty Ideals

Beauty ideals are not fixed truths. They change across cultures and throughout history, which tells us they are socially constructed.

Yet girls often receive messages suggesting there is a single way to be beautiful — and that achieving it is their responsibility.

Caring about appearance is not inherently harmful. Grooming and self-expression can be enjoyable forms of self-care. But when appearance becomes the primary focus, it can crowd out confidence, curiosity, and other goals.

What parents can do:

• Talk openly about how beauty standards change over time.
• Encourage critical thinking about advertising, filters, and influencer culture.
• Reinforce that a person’s worth is never dependent on their appearance.

3. Support a Healthy Relationship With Food

Body dissatisfaction is often connected to rigid food rules, guilt around eating, and labeling foods as “good” or “bad.”

Research suggests that approaches that encourage listening to hunger and fullness cues are linked to better psychological well-being than rigid food restriction.

What parents can do:

• Avoid labeling foods as virtuous or shameful.
• Model balanced, flexible eating.
• Emphasize nourishment, enjoyment, and variety rather than restriction.

4. Encourage Compassion Toward Self and Others

Girls often notice early that certain appearances are rewarded socially. Unfortunately, this awareness can fuel comparison, exclusion, and teasing.

Research shows that shaming and teasing do not motivate healthier behavior. Instead, they are associated with higher levels of depression, anxiety, and disordered eating.

What parents can do:

• Teach self-compassion. Mistakes and imperfections are part of being human.
• Encourage kindness and respect in friendships.
• Address appearance-based teasing directly and firmly.
  • Example: “That’s not how we talk about bodies in our home.”

5. Start Conversations Early — and Keep Them Going

Many parents feel pressure to have a single “big talk” about sensitive topics like bodies, health, or mental well-being.

Research shows that frequent, low-pressure conversations over time are much more effective.

What parents can do:

• Raise topics before they become urgent.
• Use everyday moments — TV shows, advertisements, or social media posts — as conversation starters.
• Share helpful resources and books grounded in research.

6. Model the Values You Want Girls to Learn

Girls learn just as much from what adults do as from what adults say.

If adults frequently criticize their own bodies, obsess over appearance, or connect worth with looks, those messages are easily absorbed.

What parents can do:

• Model balanced self-care.
• Treat movement as joyful and functional rather than punishment.
• Show that confidence, kindness, and character matter more than appearance.

A Note on Evidence-Based Resources

When I first wrote The Body Image Book for Girls, I drew on hundreds of studies to ensure that the information was accurate, practical, and developmentally appropriate. A revised edition builds on that work and reflects what I learned from listening to girls themselves. Through interviews, focus groups, and informal conversations, girls told me they wanted clear answers, relatable stories, and concrete tools to help them develop a positive body image.

No single resource can eliminate body dissatisfaction forever, but we can arm our girls with critical-thinking skills and bolster their emotional resilience. We can help them have compassion for themselves and others and appreciate that their sense of worth is rooted in who they are, not how they look.

Final Thoughts on Helping Girls Develop a Positive Body Image

Helping girls develop a positive body image is not about saying the perfect thing or following a script.

It’s about creating an environment that values health, kindness, curiosity, and authenticity over appearance.

Parents and caregivers cannot shield girls from every cultural pressure. But you can give them the tools to navigate those pressures with confidence.

With open conversations, evidence-based guidance, and supportive role models, adults can play a transformative role in helping girls grow up fearless.

A new and updated edition of The Body Image Book for Girls: Love Yourself and Grow Up Fearless will be published in March 2026.

Wondering how to help your child navigate social media without harming their body image? Download our free Parent’s Guide to Social Media for expert-backed tips to reduce harm and build confidence.